He's an actual, living breathing 'circuit veteran', he knows where the old Comedy Store used to be, and he can animate a visa card – that's right, it's Addy van der Borgh!

Name: Addy van der Borgh.

Where do you live?: In my head most of the time, and I can occasionally be seen wandering aimlessly around Clapham.

How long have you been gigging for?: Fourteen (count them) fourteen years.

What do you do?: I presume you mean style i.e what’s my thang? Well, I guess I'm known for animating inanimate objects such as wine bottles, computers, library books, a visa card and virginity (not an object, but it does get in the way of a good time).

Who makes you laugh?: My girlfriend, my family, Billy Connolly and Richard Prior. Oh and Reggie Watts, a brilliant comic from NYC who will be massive one day.

At which London comedy clubs do you usually perform?: Comedy Store, Up the Creek, Balham Banana Cabaret, Jongleurs’s, 99 Club, King’s Head, Covent Garden Comedy Club etc etc.

What is your favourite London comedy venue?: The Comedy Store for big, the 99 Club Leicester Square (old Comedy Store) for not so big.

What are you/should you be famous for?: My comic acting and comic face.

What is your placing in the Top Million Comedians League?: In MY top million (which is what counts), number one. Realistically, in everyone else’s, three or four.

Who is your celebrity doppelganger?: Rene Descartes, a funny, funny man.

Whose sex face would you least like to see?: Rene Descartes.

Audiences love it when I... fulfill my contractual obligation to make them laugh.

Audiences hate it when I... don't.

And here's young Addy live in action...