LiF blogger Ian Smith is in reflective mood. Today he sits back on his veranda, pops on some massive glasses and runs through his time at Goldsmiths University

Person A: “Do you read Ian Smith’s blogs?”
Person B: “Who’s Ian Smith?”
Person A: “A really good comedian. Do you read his blogs?”
Person B: “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

(Person B leaves and Person A (Ian Smith) moves over to the next person in the cafe.)

Writing my LondonisFunny blogs at 2 in the morning often reminds me of my university days, drinking 35p energy drinks from increasingly vague sounding brands ("Energy" and "Value Energy Drink"). The discovery of the 35p energy drinks meant that for the usual £1.10 Red Bull, you could buy three of these and still have 5p change to throw in anger later that night (or, save up over time to buy a new pen or a car).

I would often have about 12 of these drink and end the night shaking, pupils dilated, staring at letters piled together in bunches, some of which appeared to be words. Once, on returning to my work in the morning, I had typed "bifgngntjgg". After it was a semi-colon. No idea why.

Yet despite all that, still I sit here, the only person awake in my house, eating my stale Jordan’s Country Crisp cereal from the bag, throwing energy drink cans in my face and then picking them up, opening them and drinking them normally. Have I learnt nothing?

(I’m glad I stayed up though, as tonight my housemate came back late, drunk, and we decided to put a hoover in (comedian and housemate) Tom Toal’s bed. What’s funny about that? When he comes back tomorrow he’ll find it, and see that we’ve attached a condom to the end. Classic. Next to it we put a bag of popcorn and a Lee Hurst DVD. What a narrative we've created.)

It’s a common thing after university, when people don’t get a job, or go into a different line of work, to wonder: "Did I waste those three years of my life?" or "Was that dance course the right choice?" And then there’s the sentimental stuff: the friends you make and all that shit. But here are a few more things I think I learnt while at university, even if it hasn’t made me any better at working to deadlines:

• I rediscovered a childish, nostalgic love for pix ’n’ mix, and then had so much I started to hate it.

• Despite one girl's opinion, "Maybe you could have dragons in it" is not an appropriate or suitable critique for my, and the rest of the classes', short stories. (This girl clearly hadn't read anyone's stories and ambitiously chanced her arm with the dragon idea. Genius really. No one would think you would make something so shit up, so people just thought she was mental, "took her advice on board" and ignored her).

• People occupying something in protest of occupations are idiots.

• I don’t care if someone thinks they know what their horse is feeling and can communicate through body language; it needs more evidence to not piss me off.

• Truman in The Truman Show – is his name code for True Man? The only True Man there? I only noticed that when doing an essay on it in first year. Love that fucking film.

• £1 a pint is a great deal and you should use offers like that while you can.

• Despite being an awful lecturer, Angela McRobbie has had a fan video made by someone who pronounces her name McRobe-ay. It's hilarious/weird/awkward. The best part of the video is "Take Five". It has taken him five attempts to make this video.)

• You only get one sausage, cut in half, in the sausage roll at Goldsmiths cafe. Get a sandwich, there’s two or three in that fucker.

• Having a roof in a dining room improves it tenfold.

• Every student house should get some form of pet. Even if you end up eating it.

• Seeing a duck maul, and eat, a frog, will upset a vegetarian.

• Lastly, it’s important to experiment with the way you look during university. For example, I spent the first half of my second year, with the stylish look you can see at the top of the page. It’s a look I’ll try again in a few years if I can find that straw hat.

You can follow Ian Smith on Twitter at @iansmithcomedy.